Sunday, April 25, 2010

Turning Down the Volume

These last couple of months have been strange ones at our house. It's like everything has been just slightly off kilter. Situations in our lives and people around us were just getting stranger and stranger. And then this weekend, the axis of the whole thing shifted in a very negative direction. And it reminds me of some things I've learned in the thirty years I've been alive.

First and foremost, and probably the hardest lesson I'm STILL trying to learn is that you cannot control the actions and feelings of other people. The absolute only thing you can control is your reaction to them. You can get caught up in the moment and lash out in very cruel and thoughtless ways, or you can evaluate the situation and try to figure out what it's really about. And realize that most of the time it's not really about you. It's about other people trying to work out their own demons in their own misguided ways. So you can jump right in the middle of their angry rant with them, or you can stand back and let them scream it out, while you try to think of more productive and healthy ways to work through whatever problem you're having.

The second thing I'm reminded of is something I learned a very long time ago from my dad. He's always told me, "Ashly, as long as you're doing something, moving forward, being successful, producing something, you're always going to be upsetting the status quo." Somebody is always going to have something to say about it. And it's not always going to be positive. But again, it's not always about you. So step back and look at it. If you're doing what you believe is right, stay the course. And let 'em get happy in the same pants they got mad in.

And I'm also starting to realize that through the barrage of social media outlets I've been utilizing lately, I've invited people into my life that probably I really should not have. I realize that it's fun to catch up with people online, but sometimes you need to live your life off-screen. Facebook, twitter, it all adds to the noise. So I'm turning down the volume.

I'm in an extremely good place in my life. I have the most fabulous, loving, caring husband in the world, and I could not have picked a better human being to commit to loving for the rest of my life. I am succeeding in my purpose on this earth to help people by teaching my kiddos at school how to think and use their brains to reason through situations and then to use that knowledge for good to make the world around them better. I have a fantastic home and relationship that is always a safe place for me to fall when things outside it get to be too much. And my family, quirky as they are, are the most supporting and encouraging and positive people I know. I literally could not ask for more, and I am more thankful than I could possibly express.

So I'm continuing the metamorphosis. Yes, I'm changing. I always have been and suspect I always will be. And I'll continue to do my best to make sure it's always a positive change. Because like dad also told me, "If it's not changing or growing, it's dead." And I never wanna be headed in that direction.

So wish me luck. :)


tomorrowsmemoriesphotography said...

Good luck!!!
Ditto... and I need to blog about it so that ppl don't start wonderin' why I deleted them off FB :D.
love you girlie!