Procrastination

You know how in college, right up front your professors would be like, Ok, you've got a twenty-page research paper that's going to be due at the end of the semester. Here's exactly what is going to be required of you. And you'd put it off til two or three nights before it was due? That's me. That's been me my entire life. It will be a dark cloud hanging over my head, impeding on my nightly sleep, consuming my daily thoughts, but I won't even attempt to make a dent in it til the very last minute.

At least I know why. I put off big tasks because I don't know where to start. How do I even begin to tackle something as big as Tolstoy's The Kreutzer Sonata? I don't. Until the verrrry last minute.

The same thing was sort of happening with this memoir. The initial first draft is finished. Basically what it amounted to was purging on the page. And stupid me, I let both parents read it. Bad idea, but at least the air is cleared now. I've been doing some research and bulking up on my knowledge of the memoir genre and getting tips and tricks on how to write a decent one, and now I'm starting the rewriting. Instead of recounting scenarios and situations like I did in the first draft, the second draft will contain more storytelling hopefully. It seemed like such a daunting task, but tonight I started chipping away at it. I'm ten pages in. Only 240 to go. Ten whole pages and I haven't even mentioned the church yet. I'm concentrating on building the foundation of our family and childhood. Which right now while I'm writing this doesn't really seem complete without mentioning the church, but I guess I'm just introducing everyone. I haven't completed the foundation yet. And yes, the church will play its part. But so far, its coming along nicely. And I feel better that I've started chipping away at it.

And I think it's a good sign that this time around I'm drinking coffee while I'm writing instead of all of Poncho's Jagermeister. That's got to be a positive progression. :)